I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
