Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
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