When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
