Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
