yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
