i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
