I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize
