Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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