I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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