The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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