no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
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