My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize