I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
