Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
