We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Randomize
