Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
