Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
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