We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
