this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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