went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
