Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
