She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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