Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Every concussion has its silver lining
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I think your dad took our porno
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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