saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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