dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
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