Got a toothbrush?
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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