I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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