I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize