I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
