lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
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