We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Randomize
