he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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