Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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