Having a random hookup so left but love u
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Randomize