is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
