then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
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