Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
love makes seman taste better
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
