real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize