organizing the empties. That sober.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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