this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
