Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
