I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Randomize