We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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