You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
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