discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
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