Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
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