When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
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