How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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