her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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