New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
