i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
You're a waste of cheezeits
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Randomize
