I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Randomize
